How We Started Homeschooling

The short answer is to just START, but read on for our family backstory, how was arrived at our decision, and our experience so far.

As our daughter turned four years old, we started naturally thinking about school and what that would look like for her and our family. Especially kindergarten. We realized that eventually we would be losing a lot of time with her if she was in traditional public school for 5-6 hours, five days a week.

My husband, Jaremy, does not work a typical 9-5 job. His business in independent distribution operates very early mornings to early afternoons or (sometimes) late afternoons. He also typically works at least one weekend day. Due to the nature of the industry, it’s much easier for him to take off a Wednesday than a Saturday.

Since I am primarily a stay-at-home mom, my flexibility is just about endless.

If Viv went to traditional public (or even private) school, things we could normally do would have to be saved for weekends and planned ahead in advance, which is not always easy to do with the nature of Jaremy’s business. Things come up for him all the time, often last minute, and it makes planning too far ahead really challenging. If you are also a business owner, I’m sure you can relate.

In case you aren’t in the school systems yet, schools in Minnesota don’t love when you yank your kid out for a reason other than illness, and even then they often require a doctor’s note for anything longer than a couple of days or else it becomes “unexcused.”

Too many unexcused absences and the county can get involved to make sure to make sure you are meeting the state requirements that you silently agreed to upon sending them to public school.

I won’t get into my true feelings about not being able to personally excuse my own child from school for whatever reason I want, but that alone would definitely cramp the quality family time we get, especially when it comes to trips and vacations.

Not to mention that with a public school schedule comes busier “seasons,” such as fall break, winter break, and spring break, all of which are within the same few weeks the rest of the state has breaks, during which time airfare goes sky high and hotels and rentals raise their prices because, supply and demand.

All of a sudden, come kindergarten, we would be very limited to the time we would have with our little triangle and possibly lose it altogether between Jaremy’s work schedule and the typical school day schedule, not to mention any extracurricular activities.

Now, I wouldn’t say that we chose the homeschool route just to accommodate our traveling.

We really value our time as a family. And Jaremy and I value the experiences that we get to have together, but specifically what Viv gets to experience as she grows and how she gets to have those experiences.

Neither one of us traveled or did much outside of regular home and school life as children or teens, and it’s important to us that she gets a wide variety of exposure to different activities and places, while also learning how to take care of herself as she grows and learns how to be a human.

Most of this happens when we are either together as a family or, yes–on vacation–where we’re all in the same place, experiencing a new area or culture, and enjoying ourselves doing activities we like, or trying something totally new and different.

Aside from traveling and taking vacations, Jaremy and I both really value learning life skills alongside book work. I was heavy on the book work side of learning in my educational career, whereas Jaremy was heavy on the life skills over book work. He grew up on a farm and I grew up in the cities. Together we balance each other out pretty well, but our mutual goal is that our kid has a nice balance of both.

We’ve had the idea of homeschool in the back of our minds since Viv was a toddler, for a number of reasons, but mainly because of the flexibility it offers our family. I will be using this word a LOT, because it truly is the driving force behind our “why” for homeschooling. Even to this day it remains the primary driver of our decision.

As we were going through the motions of enrolling her in some classes through our amazing local community ECFE (Early Childhood Family Education) for some socialization and early learning, the conversation naturally shifted to the subject of preschool.

In our community, we have an excellent preschool program that shares its building with kindergartners.

It’s very comforting as a parent to know that your tiny human just starting their educational journey, without you, is in a building with kids very similar in age, which can feel overwhelming for them (and you) for many reasons. It really lets them stay little and ease in, and it is something that was very attractive to us.

We signed her up for preschool in the fall and started to prepare her for being away from mom and dad for 5-6 hours a day. But even though we went through the process, I continued to feel a little tug to keep learning more and not close the door on the homeschool option for our family.

We knew a couple of families that were already homeschooling and I watched what they were doing and even asked questions here and there. At this point, it felt like something that was just kind of cool to talk about. Like a “wouldn’t it be cool if we could make that work?” Not a serious enough issue or topic for either of us.

I kept feeling like we should be talking more about it before ruling it out completely, and so we did. My husband listened and agreed on most points, but also was worried about what a lot of parents worry about with the topic of homeschool: socialization. How would she learn how to interact with other kids her age? How would she make friends? (More on that shortly).

I didn’t bulldoze my husband into being on my side. He was still okay with public school and being that most of Viv’s friends were doing the traditional school path, I dropped what felt like a daydream and prepared for her to be in public school.

Until yet another tragedy happened.

Less than a week before preschool was supposed to start, there was another fatal school shooting. Not a few states away. In Minneapolis. Less than an hour away. At a private Catholic school. Two precious children lost their lives.

Just after I saw the headline and was reading what little details they had at the time, Jaremy called me while he was working and said, “Pull her out. Call whoever you need to. She’s not going. I cannot be working this much just hoping that she’s safe but never really knowing.” Words I will likely never forget.

I want to be clear. This wasn’t the driving force behind our decision. It wasn’t impulsive by any means. We had been having the conversations already, and not just once, but many times over. And while they were more casual than serious, we definitely sat down and had a serious conversation about it that night.

My husband and I never make decisions from a place of fear. In fact, he’s one of the bravest people I know and he’s taught me to be braver too.

We do things scared, with risk, and often not completely thought through entirely. Not recklessly, but in trusting our guts, grit, and track record that even when we’ve been in the biggest shit storms, we’ve always figured out what to do, and made it out.

This unfortunate event, I believe, was the final piece that tipped the scales enough for him to want to truly give it a try and see if it was a good fit.

Quite honestly, I think it was the final straw for a lot of families because Minnesota saw a 7.4% increase from 2024-2025 and another 3% for the 2025-2026 school year (Center of the American Experiment, 2026). This surpassed even the COVID-19 pandemic numbers. I don’t think that is a coincidence.

After having a rational conversation about it later (versus emotional and in the moment), we decided if we were going to try it, that this would be the best year to give it a go.

Since she hadn’t already been in a traditional school setting yet, and because she was doing preschool, it would be a much easier curriculum and a way for me to get acquainted with a routine and work out some kinks before a formal curriculum would be needed around first grade (in case you didn’t know, kindergarten is actually not mandatory in Minnesota, just very common).

If homeschooling completely fell apart and I decided I couldn’t do it, or didn’t want to, or any other number of reasons it could fail, she could still start kindergarten in the fall, no big deal. This also didn’t have to be a permanent decision. We could always change our minds. She could always go to traditional school if we decided it wasn’t a good fit.

And with that, it was a done decision.

I emailed the school Saturday night the Monday before she started to let them know she would not be attending.

You can actually pull your child anytime if you decide to homeschool. A week in. A day in. Mid-year. You do not have to wait until summer vacation, or even until Friday. You can decide at noon on a Tuesday that they’re done. Mindblowing, I know, but it’s true.

There is still a procedure to follow if you decide to un-enroll them (a letter to the district, for example), but the actual decision has no due date or timeline.

That’s a decision I never had to deal with, but I know a lot of parents wonder about it if their kids are already in school. It feels kind of illegal, especially if you’re a rule follower like me, but I assure you it is not.

Even if you enrolled them already, signed paperwork, sent in forms, etc., you can still decide to homeschool if you feel strongly about it.

Homeschooling always felt like an out-of-reach dream whenever I thought about it. It was always an “I wonder what this would be like if…” scenario.

And while I had doubts about it–still do sometimes–nothing beats the benefits for us and our family dynamic. The flexibility is absolutely worth it.

I have zero regrets about trying it and I am so excited to continue on as Viv gets older. My hopes is that she continues to enjoy it too and we can do it for many years to come.

As I wrap up, I just want to offer you some encouragement if homeschooling is something you’ve thought about doing and have an interest in.

My mind built it up to be way harder than it is and I have found that it is far more enjoyable than I ever imagined. Truthfully, I was worried I wouldn’t enjoy it. But the very opposite is true.

If, after making it this far, you think I’m crazy for doing this and not taking the traditional school route, that’s fine. You do you, and I’ll do me. But I also hope maybe you’ve seen that homeschool does work really well for some families, like ours.

Homeschool tends to get badmouthed, mostly because people reject the unfamiliar. There are many people who think that homeschooling is somehow a weaker choice versus going to public school like everyone else. Or assume homeschool families are afraid of public school.

I think homeschooling is a stronger choice. We are in total control of what our kid is learning, experiencing, and being exposed to. We aren’t inside of a system that was designed in the 1800’s and has had very little updating to the model since then.

I could go on and on, but in a system that is so divided and political…I am less worried about the effect homeschool will have on my kid than I am about the effect public school has on everyone else.

If your kids go to public school, I have zero problems with that. None whatsoever. My interest is in what’s best for our family. And if public school is best for your family, that’s fantastic. I hope we can find some mutual respect for our differences.

And if you don’t think public school is best, maybe it’s time to think about what homeschooling might look like for you and your family.

If you have any additional questions that I haven’t covered, I’m an open book. Please find me and we can chat privately. I promise to be up front and honest, and if I don’t know the answer, I’ll always lead with that.

You can check out more info about homeschooling and our experience in a series of other blog posts where I go more in depth about it:

Check out Homeschool: FAQ’s for all of the most common questions we’re asked.

Homeschool: Pros + Cons for a breakdown of our biggest in each category.

I talk about the financial impact in Homeschooling: The Financial Impact.

Or look at Homeschool: Getting Started if you want to know the specifics around our curriculum and how I designed our first year.

Until next time,