It’s Valentine’s Day and, even though tons of restaurants are serving up special menus, my husband and I are opting to stay in. With eggs over $5/dozen, the cost of hiring a babysitter, and restaurant prices higher due to cost of goods, I’m going to break down how we are saving some money and time with an easy, yet still enjoyable, date night in.

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As 36 and 37 year old adults, my husband and I have reached a point where we would rather save time, money, and energy by having date nights in versus going out all the time.

We aren’t hermits, I swear. We still get dressed up and go out for special occasions. We love concerts, shows, and really delicious meals out. But on one of the most busy, crowded holidays, we are skipping the noise, crowds, and overwhelm…and staying in.

First and foremost, I highly recommend discussing what to do about your kiddos. I’m sure it’s tempting to have a family date night, but I really encourage you to make it just you and your significant other, especially if it’s rare for the two of you to get any alone time together.

As a mama, I can speak from experience that it’s tough to prioritize your spouse or significant other (S.O.) when you have children. The fact is, your kids will always want you for something. The other fact is, you deserve to enjoy the company of your S.O. without your children present so you can have adult conversations without constant interruption, and to remind yourself that you enjoy each other’s company.

Kids have a really big impact on us forgetting just how much we enjoy our S.O. How many times have you gotten into an argument or full blown fight about something that actually has nothing to do with the two of you and only started because of your kids? Be honest.

Kids are stressful on relationships. Which is why it is so important to take that factor out temporarily and spend time alone together.

I’m sure many of you are already eye rolling or ruling this out entirely because you have at least one kiddo like I do, and a babysitter seems like an absolute necessity in order for you to get any type of alone time with your S.O.

You’re not wrong. But I invite you to think just slightly outside the box with me for a moment.

The way my husband and I make this work, and save money, is by either having our toddler skip her nap (which she is always thrilled to do) so that she is ready for an earlier bedtime, or we have her nap early and wake up early, so she’s going to bed early…or at least on time. This gives us at least a little more time than usual to spend together.

I also highly encourage you to reach out to siblings or parents to watch your kids for a couple of hours, or even have a sleepover if that’s an option. You could even offer to trade time for time.

For example, if you are asking your sister to watch your babies for a couple of hours, offer to take hers for a couple of hours next week so that her and her S.O. can also have a date night together.

And if you do have a trusted, beloved babysitter you have on speed dial…what are you waiting for?! Get them on the calendar ASAP!

The short answer is…yes.

The long answer is that there are a lot of factors that can go into whatever you consider a date night, but it does not have to be expensive to be enjoyable.

If you want to do a meal, I can almost guarantee that it will be cheaper to make it at home versus going out to get the same thing. This Valentine’s Day, we are doing steak, lobster tail, and shrimp on the barbecue with loaded baked potato and grilled mushrooms.

The cost of the steak, lobster tail, and shrimp for two of us was a total of $51.75. The items were all on sale, because every single grocery store has these items on sale for Valentine’s Day, I promise (Tip: Shop smart and buy what’s on sale and in season to avoid paying inflated prices for subpar quality foods).

But let’s go back to that number–$51.75 for two New York strip steaks, two lobster tails, and an entire bag of shrimp, for two people. When I think about menu prices at a restaurant, this is about the price of one steak without anything else for one person. And even if it does come with sides, there’s no way you’re getting seafood with it. At a minimum, I would say that it’s about $50 per person. Not including appetizers, cocktails, or dessert. And my portions are much larger at home for the price per pound.

Already I’m feeling pretty great about my 50% savings on just the main course.

I also included potatoes and mushrooms in our grocery order as sides to our meal, so add in another $6. We’ll even include a block of cheese to grate, sour cream, green onion, and bacon if you really want to go all out and have loaded baked potatoes…so another $10 or so, bringing the total bill for dinner to about $67.75.

You also don’t have to leave a tip, which ends up being 20%+ more on our restaurant bill normally.

If you do decide to add alcohol to your at-home menu, the cost savings alone on beer and wine is insane. Most wines served per glass in a restaurant are anywhere from $6-$12 (or more) each. If you shop the local liquor store, you can get a decent bottle for $12-$15, which is about 4-6 glasses of wine, depending on how heavy you pour.

If you order 4-6 glasses of wine in a restaurant, you’re looking at anywhere from $24-$72 ON JUST DRINKS for the two of you. Even if you each have one or two glasses, you’re looking at an extra $12-$24 added to your tab.

Dessert can easily be shared when you are out, and this is about the only thing I think is worth the price in restaurants. I have rarely met a dessert I didn’t like, especially on a holiday. However, you’re limited to options in a restaurant.

And you’re often even more limited on Valentine’s Day because they usually have a specific menu they are using and many have ordered for it in advance to make it easier on the kitchen and wait staff. So, even if you really wanted the chocolate chip cookie à la mode or key lime pie, you might only be able to choose between cheesecake and the chocolate brownie.

Choosing your own dessert for date night in likely gets you a larger portion and better choices because you can go to any bakery or make something special yourself, likely for a lesser cost and/or bigger portions.

Planning your own at-home date night does take a little planning, but I would say it doesn’t take any more time than it would for you to get dressed and ready, handle the kiddos, drive, wait for your table (even though you made a reservation), drive again, etc.

The beauty of at-home date night is that you get to decide if you’re dressing up (highly encourage you to do this at least once for an at-home date night, because it’s kind of fun) or staying in sweats or jammies.

Depending on what you make, prep and cook time probably takes the longest.

Again, you are in charge of designing your date night in, so you can make it as fancy or laid back as you want. We’ve tried new recipes that take an hour to prepare, and also ordered pizza in. Both have been fun.

If doing an entire dinner at home still feels like a lot, and you don’t have the option of a babysitter, keep it really simple and just go for dessert! It is Valentine’s Day after all, and chocolate is the name of the day.

For dessert we are doing chocolate charcuterie. I bought one small box of chocolates, some Hershey’s bite-sized chocolates, peanut M&Ms in red and pink colors, and a slice of chocolate dream cheesecake.

I’m also seeing an awesome trend people are doing called reverse chocolate dipped strawberries, where you puree strawberries and use chunks of melted chocolate bark as your “chips” to “dip” into the strawberry puree. Inexpensive, easy, and delish!

We also love popcorn in this house and I am obsessed with popcorn and chocolate together, so we’ll be making some microwave popcorn to go along with our dessert charcuterie.

It’s also way cheaper than an entire meal. I paid a total of $24 for the candy and treats, plus another $6 for an entire box of microwave popcorn, which is 6 bags, and a 2-liter bottle of Fresca, for a total of about $34.

I am assembling the charcuterie board while we make dinner (while my kiddo is occupied doing something else) and putting it out of sight until after she is in bed, at which point our date night in will commence. We’ll have already had dinner and rested our tummies enough to indulge in some delightful treats, crawl into bed, turn on one of the shows we like, and enjoy each other’s company and dessert.

We opted for no babysitter this year, also to save on cost, and decided that two hours for our date is about what we would have if we went out anyway, at which point we will go to bed and still be asleep before 11pm.

While I am typing this for Valentine’s Day, this can actually be an easy, inexpensive date night in for anytime you and your S.O. need time together.

About once a month I surprise my husband with some type of date night charcuterie board. The nice thing is this can be planned day-of and usually just added to a grocery pickup order.

When I do this, I usually let Viv skip nap so she goes to bed early, thus insuring us a couple of hours just the two of us before bed. I truly do believe that even if you’re married, you should still date your spouse. And I don’t leave it up to just my husband to plan the dates. He’s a busy guy and there’s a good chance we would rarely “date” if I left it up to him.

So be bold, ladies, and plan your own date night in! Guys enjoy being surprised too. And if they don’t, give them enough of a heads up that you’re planning a date night in so they don’t have other plans or (in my husband’s case) fall asleep before you get upstairs from tucking in the kiddos.

I know it’s nice to have them plan something for you too. I agree. But I will say that I love doing these because then I get to pick what we’re having for charcuterie (meats and cheeses, desserts, candy, variety of popcorn, chips and dips–really anything!) and I usually do something I’m in the mood for as an excuse to eat it in the name of date night 😉

And IF your S.O. doesn’t appreciate it or like what you chose, tell them it’s on them to choose the next one. But trust me, they’ll like it. My husband looks forward to these now and even suggests when we should do one soon, which is my cue to pick the next theme and add items to my grocery list.

Dude. All the more reason to do this for YOURSELF. Make your own charcuterie or special meal, or BOTH, and have your own date night in…with yourself. Heck, even dress up. Wear that dress you bought that you only wear once a year or haven’t even worn yet because you have no clue where to wear it but it was 75% off and your size and you feel amazingly cute when you wear it. Don’t forget lipstick.

Or, take off all your makeup, put on your favorite sweatpants and pull an Elle Woods after she’s dumped by Warner and sit in your bathrobe in bed watching movies and eating your own box of chocolates. Do it even if you aren’t depressed because it’s actually really fun and relaxing.

However you spend Valentine’s Day, I hope your day is filled with love and light, and that you are spending it how you want to and with who you want to spend it alongside. Until next time,